God’s original blueprint for the family Pt 1def: blueprint, purpose, subdue, teamBlueprint: a design plan or other technical drawing.Purpose:  something set up as an object or end to be attained, INTENTIONSubdue: to bring under control Team: a number of persons associated together in work or activityDoes the organization/team/family exist to benefit the individual or does the individual exist to benefit the organization/team/family Gen 1:26-28Deut 6:4-9Deut 4:9

Family Remodel #5

What is vision and why do we need it for a family?Vision: the ability of sight; the act or power of imagination“The most pathetic person in the world is someone who has sight but no vision.”― Helen KellerProverbs 29:18 "Where there is no vision people perish."Habakkuk 2:2-3

Family Remodel #4

Here's what we have developed over the last 20+ years as a family: family verse, family vision, family rules, family expectations, blessing (personal/family). Family verse: “Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good deeds, and glorify your Father in heaven.” ‭‭Matthew‬ ‭5:16‬ Family vision statement: “We are a passionate gospel-centered multi-generational family team with a fire, aim, ready mindset eager to serve with the love of Christ.” Family Rules-Everyone has a sign that says make me feel important; speak to that sign, God is 1st others 2nd I’m 3rd, If you want to be great, serve many Family Expectations:... Family Blessings: Proverbs 3:5-6, Numbers 6:24-26, Matt 5:13-16, Zeph 3:17, Sons' Blessing, Daughters' Blessing

Family Remodel #3

Family Remodel Episode #2Culture vs ChristHappy vs BlessedCulture says do what makes you happy. The Bible says the man who follows His ways is blessed. Be a man that is planted and rooted in Christ alone. If you look for someone to make you happy, they will fail you every time. A fathers shepherds his kids.  Culture tells a man its his job to go raise the funds and it's the wife's job to raise the kids. Don't come home with a pocket full of money to a house full of strangers. Raise your kids with your wife. Psalm 1:1-6 , Jeremiah 17:7-8, James 1:12, Psalm 127

Family Remodel #2

Why family remodel? Where are we, where are we going, how are we going to get there?Remodel-To make over in structure or style; reconstruct.Ever wonder if there is more to raising your kids than graduate high school, go to college, now you're on your own. I felt like I was missing something a few years ago. So I went on a journey to seek out God's original design for the family. My family was established and growing so rather than rebuild it we decided to remodel and refocus on God's design.  

Family Remodel #1

The heart of the Rewired Men's Conference is the men's lives transformed by the Gospel lived out in the local Church. What's the foundation of your faith, of your marriage, of your family? Come to the conference this year to learn what it means to "Dig Deep" and lay your foundation on the rock. Learn what it means to be a man founded on the rock. This is a message I shared at the 2021 Oklahoma Baptists Rewired Men's Conference. In this message I share about Luke 6:46-49. The 2022 Rewired Men's Conference is April 29/30. Registration is open now at: https://www.oklahomabaptists.org/men/rewired-conference/

2021 Rewired Men's Conference

Word of the Week #30 Hope-your desire for something to happen.In a time when there is so much darkness, fear, and doubt being spread why not spread hope. Hope is like the dawn after a dark night. I tell my kids that I can smell the aroma of their heart. If they are in a bad mood then the aroma stinks. If they are in a good mood then the aroma of their heart smells sweet. Hope is similar to sowing seed and reaping. You will always harvest what you sow. If you sow corn seed then you will harvest corn. If you sow seeds of darkness and doubt then expect to harvest darkness and doubt. If you sow seeds of hope then you can expect to harvest hope. A coach, leader, father must sow seeds of hope, must be a light in the darkness. As the leader you can tell when your attitude stinks. Stop, pause, take stock of what's going well, get your mind right and sow good seed. How's the aroma of your heart? What kind of seed are you sowing?

Word of the Week #30 Hope

It's OU vs TX week and I hate Texas Football! Here's a story of one of the scariest coaches I ever played for. Dick Winder was the OC at OU in the late 90's. He demanded excellence and made me nervous every day. He was always on me to "set the damn huddle", sprint to the line of scrimmage, snap the ball, and "owe me's". I greatly respected him and feared him. He demanded excellence. In my eyes he treated everybody the same from the walk-on to the all star. A great coach demands excellence, pushes his athletes past what they "think" they can do to be as good as the want to be. A father must help to set the vision for what "can be" for his kids and help build the plan to achieve their goals. 

Football Story #7 Set the Damn Huddle!

Great teams play to the best of their ability week in and week out. Great teams don't play up or down to the level of their opponent they play on an edge no matter their opponent. Inexperienced teams don't know how to handle adversity. Great teams stay focused and stay on edge. What does a great man of God do? Colossians 3:23-"Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human master." Revelations 3:15-16 "I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either one or the other! 16 So, because you are lukewarm—neither hot nor cold—I am about to spit you out of my mouth."Great leaders bring it everyday. Great men of God live out their faith, serving all those around them. Great fathers will do whatever it takes for their family to thrive. 

Football Story #6 Play on Edge

Manhood Moments-Friday Night Lights. Manhood does not happen by accident. Manhood is about intentionality. "Being male is a matter of birth. Being a man is a matter of choice." Edwin Louis Cole/Tony EvansIf I don't show my sons how a man acts, culture will. If I don't show my daughter how a man treats a wife in how I treat her mother, culture will. And I'm not OK with that. Be intentional men. 

Manhood Moments-Friday Night Lights

The oline goes unnoticed unless they don't do their job. The oline mentality is a group of guys willing to do the things others won't so the team can succeed. No group on the team works as closely together as the oline. They work literally foot to foot, hip to hip, and shoulder to shoulder.Oline CreedI believe we need more men, husbands, and fathers with an olinemen's mentality. It's not about me. Too many men live life like a skill player, on an island. We are meant to live live as groups of men on a mission together. Working together foot to foot, hip to hip, and shoulder to shoulder. Men working together to challenge and encourage each other to impact our families. 

Football Story #5 Why we need more olinemen

Masculinity is the qualities or attributes regarded as characteristics of men. Toxic or poisonous masculinity is a skewed cultural construct. Noble or higher masculinity is what we should strive for. Quotes on manhood. "Being male is a matter of birth, being a man is a matter of choice." "All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing." "When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me."The root issue of toxic masculinity is the deconstruction of the family. If we are dealing with a masculinity issue, I believe it is a result of fathers not modeling manhood, not guiding their sons on the journey of manhood. "If you do not initiate your young men into the tribe, they will burn down the village." African ProverbEvery young male needs a guide on the lifelong journey of manhood. Rite of Passage LetterProverbs 17:6 "..the glory of sons is their father."

Masculinity, Fatherhood, and Rite of Passage

I played football at OU but how I got there is an interesting story. February 1996 was when I was supposed to sign my scholarship to college football but that didn't happen. I remember coming home feeling down and rejected. Little did I know my mom has gone to work calling and setting up appointments for me to walk on the OU football team. Thank you mama!!! It was a scary leap of faith but it was totally worth it. I am so grateful to my parents for the courage they instilled in me to follow through and achieve my goals. Sometimes the scary decisions are the ones that help us grow the most. In the end it worked out pretty well. The Rewired Men's Conference hosted at Falls Creek by the Oklahoma Baptists is coming up April 24/25. Go to the websites for more info:https://www.menrewired.com/https://www.oklahomabaptists.org/men/  

Football Story #4 National Letter of Intent Signing Day

I played in the Orange Bowl, the BCS Championship game at the time, on Jan 3, 2001. After the game about 2AM I went to Denny's at 2AM to eat with my best friend and my brother in law. We had won the game and I was a team captain. No one really seemed to care , I was just another customer. In that moment I learned a valuable lesson, a leader shouldn't make a big deal about himself.A great leader gives praise to those he leaders and absorbs all criticism for failures. Don't let winning and losing define you as a leader/coach. Who you are is so much more than a score on the scoreboard.As a leader/coach you are the lead servant. Serving those you lead, doing whatever it takes to help the team succeed.

Football Story #3 Denny's at 2AM

Initiative is the ability to take the lead, take charge when no one else will. When adversity strikes you need leaders on your team who will take the initiative to right the ship. A good leader/coach takes the initiative and refocuses the team when bad stuff is happening. Belief in the leaders initiative and vision, being a leader they trust, gets the action needed. A coach with initiative sees problems as they are developing. He makes a plan to stop them and acts. When no one else acts the leader must initiate change. 

Word of the Week #29 Initiative

Building a man is like building a house, you must start with the foundation, his faith. A man without faith is like a house built on a sand foundation. The storms of life will wash it away. Matthew 7:24-27 Hebrews 11:1, A man who has faith in the Lord has a moral compass, a firm foundation. A man of faith is like the man in Psalms 1:1-3. A man of faith fears the Lord and seeks God's will for his life. Proverbs 9:10A man of faith is rooted in God's Word. He seeks Godly wisdom. He surrounds himself with other men of faith on a similar mission. 

Manhood #7 The Man and His Faith

A coach is someone who helps you to see who you can be and gives you the action steps to get there.Coaching stories about Merv Johnson, My Middle School football coach, Sam Pittman, and my 2nd year as a head ball coach.5 Base Principles of coaching. There are more than 5 but this is where I would start.1-They don't care how mush you know until they know how much you care.2-Check your ego at the door.3-Its not about the W's and the L's or the X's and the O's its about the Jimmys and the Joes. Relationships&gt;Championships.4-Fundamentals are key!5-Never forget your "why".Finally never forget a coach is a vision for manhood, marriage, fatherhood, and leadership. Be a coach worth following. Go to menrewired.com to find more info about the Rewired Men's Conference.  

Word of the Week #28 Coach

I got into a fight in the 9th grade in a game vs the El Reno Indians.I was hurt and angry because we lost the game, I let my team down, I lost control of my emotions, and my parents divorce. My coaches saw that I was broken and hurt. They built me back up, refocused me, and released me at the end of my suspension.Great coaches see the individual hearts on the team and work to coach them well, showing them the little shifts to be successful. Be a student of your athletes, their home life, and their friends. Give them the coaching they need. Menrewired.com

Football Story #2 9th Grade Football Fight

Passion is an internal desire to achieve your goals.  I learned from Coach Venables and Spurrier JR how to coach  with passion. They ran around with their hair on fire getting stuff done.  A leader must have passion. Without passion the leader is empty. When the leader loses passion he becomes a manager. Managers are transactional. A coach must bring passionate positive infectious energy everyday.  A man must passionately pursue God’s will for his life. 

Word of the Week #27 Passion

I was a HS guard and went to college a center.  At OU day one I was the 4th string center and I had never played center before and I was clueless.  My first real reps at center were a disaster and some of the coaches didn’t even know my name.  Thankfully a tough talk from my mom and the guiding instruction from a legendary coach kept me focused. 

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