ABOUT THE GUEST:  Brad Pankey is a runner, wanderer, a rocker, and a roller. He's also none of these things at the same time. In this episode, I go solo for the second time and talk about how my mental and physical wandering mind has taken me on many adventures and taught me profound lessons. While this all sounds great, it has not been easy because I have resisted feeling comfortable being "directionless." Is that what a "man" does? Shouldn't I find a passion to pursue? That's what I have been told, and that's often what men are told... but it's not me. How do I reconcile this and how has it changed me? Listen in to find out. Enjoy!


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14 - "Not All Who Wander Are Lost" w/ Myself

ABOUT THE GUEST: Derek Hamilton is an engineer, runner, husband, Hood to Coast volunteer, kilt wearer and none of these things at the same time. Derek and his Scottish accent joined me having never met in person. He is also one of the only guests to be a fan of the show, having listened to most episodes. Due to his sense of curiosity, Derek helped me take this conversation to places I didn't expect. Mostly, his ability to be fully present and engaged made me feel safe to open up and question my current patterns of thinking. This was truly one of my favorite episodes to date on the MMP. Listen in, send me feedback, and enjoy!


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13 - "What's Under That Kilt?" w/ Derek Hamilton

ABOUT THE GUEST:  Brad Pankey is a podcaster, runner, uncle, grandson, and none of these things at the same time. In this episode, I go solo for the first time and talk about my ego, identity,  letting of my identity, taking power from my ego, and what is left after a decade of working to strip myself down to my truth. Other than discovering there is a lot more work to do, I found a few gifts hiding beneath the layers of the onion. Listen in, send me feedback, and enjoy!


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12 - "L'ego My Ego" w/ Myself

ABOUT THE GUEST:  Nicholas Freeland is a son, brother, fingerboard creator, and probably one of the most love filled and focused 17 year old humans I have ever met. Nicholas is the nephew of previous guest Tommy Freeland, whom he also lives with. He was raised by Tommy's parents, his grandparents, but he considers them his mom and dad. Nicholas grew up in Anacortes, WA for the majority of his life and resides there today. I thought it would be interesting to talk to Nicholas to see if I could learn how much of how we define ourselves as men is from nature and how much is from nurture. He ended up revealing himself as one of the most grounded, thoughtful, and loving young adult that I have ever met. Nicholas has never been afraid to explore different creative outlets, and he hasn't bought into the pressure to be a certain way. The result is a young man who thinks and sees the world well beyond his years. Plug in and prepare to be blown away by a young man who is full of love. Enjoy!


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Nicholas Freeland

Instagram: @nickfb__pnw

11 - "A New Hope" w/ Nicholas Freeland

ABOUT THE GUEST: Tommy Freeland is a son, brother, uncle, jeweler, and my plutonic soulmate. Residing in Anacortes, WA, Tommy helps operate his family business while also finding the time to be an incredible and loving friend. There isn't much to say here about Tommy because we cover EVERYTHING from our post high school relationship to our current pseudo-adult state. Part two of my chat with Tommy covers our late teenage to adult years. Here, like all of our conversations, Tommy and I chat with ease and vulnerability. We go deep into some dark places thanks to Tommy's willingness to look at himself honestly. It was refreshing, powerful, and it made me love this dude even more than I did, which I didn't think was possible. Settle in and enjoy!
TOPICS COVERED: The genesis or a heroin addiction, rehab, living outside of the "normal" curve, finding happiness and joy in contentment, deep connections between male friends, differences between men and women, and much more!


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Tommy Freeland

Please email or Tweet the show to show Tommy love

10 - "Black Tar & Cigarettes" w/ Tommy Freeland, Pt. 2

ABOUT THE GUEST: Tommy Freeland is a son, brother, uncle, jeweler, and my plutonic soulmate. Residing in Anacortes, WA, Tommy helps operate his family business while also finding the time to be an incredible and loving friend. There isn't much to say here about Tommy because we cover EVERYTHING from childhood to our current pseudo-adult state. Part one of my chat with Tommy covers our childhood, while part two covers the late teenage to adult years. Here, like all of our conversations, Tommy and I chat with ease and vulnerability. Settle in and enjoy!
TOPICS COVERED: Part one of a two part episode: How parenting style influenced us as men, when we first thought about our masculinity, when we first tried to masculine up for other guys, and we share a lot about growing up as close friends.
BONUS THOUGHTS IN OPEN:  I take a moment to check in with myself and explore how I am feeling given the current refugee crisis at the border.
HOW TO HELP THOSE AFFECTED BY BORDER CRISIS: Please consider donating to the following:

ALCU: For nearly 100 years, the ACLU has been our nation’s guardian of liberty, working in courts, legislatures, and communities to defend and preserve the individual rights and liberties that the Constitution and the laws of the United States guarantee everyone in this country.
RAICES: The Refugee and Immigrant Center for Education and Legal Services is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit that promotes justice by providing free and low-cost legal services to underserved immigrant children, families and refugees in Central and South Texas. RAICES is the largest immigration non-profit in Texas with offices in Austin, Corpus, Dallas, Fort Worth, Houston, and San Antonio.



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Tommy Freeland

Please email or Tweet the show to show Tommy love

9 - "The Unmentionables" w/ Tommy Freeland, Pt. 1

ABOUT THE GUEST: Willie McBride is an ultra runner, "fast packer,"  fitness coach, son, brother, and inspiring man with a thirst for adventure. To describe Willie McBride as being merely "cool" would like referring to The Grand Canyon as simple crack in the ground. It's almost certain that his cool head and warm heart are a result of his connection with nature, where he spends a lot of his time running, hiking, and fast packing, in his thrilling brushes with danger while climbing, and on his journey of overcoming crippling anxiety in his childhood. Willie has overcome great obstacles on his way where he is now, living and working in Portland, OR. Currently, he co-operates his wellness business, Wy'East Wolfpack, with Yassine Diboun. Both men are inspiring people to push beyond the comforts of 20% effort to discover their dormant potential. Willie had already inspired me to push beyond my comfort zone before this conversation, and I left feeling even more motivated to push further.
TOPICS COVERED: Resisting the macho environment in team sports, the value of connecting with nature, what happens when we're attracted to amazing women, crippling anxiety and much more!
BONUS THOUGHTS:  I rambled about our culture's use of labels, our desire to define everything for convenient organization, the complexity of the human animal, and why, despite my own doubts, I am more motivated than ever to continue having these conversations on this podcast.

Psychology Today Article: Two Myths and Three Facts About the Differences in Men and Women's Brains by Christian Jarrett Ph.D



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Willie McBride

Follow on Instagram: @thewilliemcride
Website: www.wyeastwolfpack.com

8 - "It All Comes Full Circle" w/ Willie McBride

ABOUT THE GUEST
Jeff Armstrong is a husband, father, brother, (my former) professor, and straight forward (in the best way!) man. He joined me for an enlightening conversation in the apartment about his approach to parenting, being a present husband, and working hard to be the best professor he can be. I first met Jeff in 2008, when I was completing my undergraduate degree in Exercise Science. From the jump, it was evident he was passionate about teaching and about the subject, physiology, and that same passion made it's way into this conversation. Having grown up in Pittsburgh, PA, and being the elderly statesmen amongst all of the MMP guests so far, I knew he'd have a unique perspective to share, and he did not disappoint. Get present and open your mind for a fun episode. Enjoy!
TOPICS COVERED: Allowing boys to find their by failing, gender identity in sports, how he works to be a fully present husband with sincerity, internet dating, what make men feel like men, his relationship with his parents, stories about his dad, his fear in raising his son, and much more!
BONUS THOUGHTS: A bonus mini episode (14 minutes) is included in the outro. I go solo and share how I have been feeling this last week after hearing about Anthony's Bourdain death. I also share a few stories about loneliness and depression, including what made me feel better in those moment.
If you need help: Call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.


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Jeff Armstrong

Blog: www.carpefriggindiem.com

7 - "Baby Steps Forward" w/ Jeff Armstrong, PhD

Morgan Rich is a father, sweet guy, former hockey player, and a man who is not afraid to step into the dark places to do the hard work. In fact, it is the latter of those things that Morgan assists others doing as his profession. Residing and working in Portland, OR, Morgan works with teens and their parents to empower them with the knowledge and confidence to work through the difficult, anxiety inducing unknowns of growing up. He joined me for an illuminating conversation that came at a point in my life when I needed it most. We talked about our similarities in growing up as sweet, slightly aloof boys that floated along but never felt like we had a place to rest. Morgan offered tips on how he is able to move past being seen as a "sweet guy," while at the same time remaining a heart felt and caring person. One of the key attributes we need to nurture in young men, he says, is having the ability to have reasonable and calm discussions on tough matters, which means we can't forget to talk with boys in a time that is focused on helping women in the MeToo movement. We ruminate on the possible downstream effects of the MeToo movement, how we need to keep the sweet men involved, and at what point does the movement go too far. None of these things are easy to talk about, but Morgan offers a steady and reasonable voice to a confusing subject. This is a powerful talk that left me thinking about what makes me feel like a man, among many other things. Enjoy!

You can meet Morgan during his talk, "Men Abusing Power," at Yoga Union in SE Portland, OR on June 15th, 2018. You can also visit his website to learn more about his upcoming retreat, "Find Your Path," which is happening on June 25th through 29th, 2018.



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Morgan Rich

Watch on Youtube: Play Huge Coaching
Follow on Twitter: @morganPlayHuge
Website: www.playhuge.com
Email: morgan@playhuge.com

6 - "Downstream Affects" w/ Morgan Rich

Yassine Diboun is a father, husband, ultra-runner, co-owner-lead wolf at WyEast Wolfpack, which helps people get active, healthy, and fit. He spends a lot of time inspiring people to find their best selves, and he is well equipped to do so given what he has overcome. Yassine's powerful story of perseverance started in Erie, Pennsylvania, where his father, a Moroccan immigrant and the only person from his family to come to America, met his mother in college. The marriage was not for long, however. Yassine's parents split when he as about six years old. From there, his mother raised three children on her own. For Yassine, this was only the start of a difficult road ahead. His mother chose to move the family from the diverse area of Erie to an almost all white rural Pennsylvania because of an opportunity to pay down her student loans. Yassine became harder to handle for his mother as he grew into a young, larger, and stronger man. He also started to present his anger and resentment for not having a father around, moving from his friends, and feeling lost. Combining those feelings with not having much to do in a small town lead Yassine down a path of heavy drinking, which he eventually realized he couldn't stop. It took an intervention to get Yassine to stop drinking, along with a of "inner work," as he says. He realized that he had an addictive personality and needed to fill it with something else, so he took up running, an activity which he happens to be quiet talented at. He shares that he still has hard days, but that he finds balance and peace from his running and family. This is a beautiful conversation from an incredibly inspiring and gentle man, whom I am grateful to have met and talked with. Enjoy!


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Yassine Diboun

Follow on Instagram: @yassinediboun
Follow on Twitter: @yassinediboun
Personal Website: www.yassinediboun.com
Training Website: www.wyeastwolfpack.com

5 - "Once a Pickle, Never a Cucumber" w/ Yassine Diboun

Ed Rogers is a podcaster, creator, husband, new father, son, and my Brobi Wan Kabrobi when it comes to podcasting. I first met Ed via  a work acquaintance after I expressed interest in starting a podcast. Ed edits my work acquaintance's podcast, and he also has his own podcast, Puck Fortland. He seemed like the perfect person for me to connect with, and connect we did. From the jump in our first in person meeting, Ed and I hit it off, getting into deeper musings about life and being happy with the pursuit. It was bromance at first sight. Eventually, I joined Ed on this podcast and talked about my original idea for a podcast, which involved smoking a lot of cannabis, with my cousin. He has been gracious enough to guide me through the process of starting a podcast to what you hear now, which is a semi-complete product. In this episode, Ed and I talk about how men sometimes form these instant bonds, how we get that feeling that another man is not a threat. We also talk about Ed's dad and finding the balance between verbal sharing of love and physical "beat downs" between men and their sons. Throughout the entire conversation, Ed displays the rare (for now) ability in a man to come across as both caring , showing his feminine self, and confident, flexing his masculine self. He shows that attuning to both, balancing them up, can create harmony within, which, for Ed, shines through your eyes. We go deep into all of these things and more in what was perhaps my favorite episode yet. Enjoy!


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Ed Rogers

Follow on Instagram: @puckfortland
Follow on Twitter: @puckfortland
Website: www.puckfortland.com

4 - "What did you learn today?" w/ Ed Rogers

Caleb O'Halloran is a freelance videographer, a man with a coffee preference, a husband, son, brother, and an incredibly insightful dude from Portland, OR. He stopped by my empty apartment/cave for a chat that opened up to a very vulnerable place quite quickly. Caleb and I chatted about him joining me for an episode before we actually recorded, but we never talked about our parents. It was quite the surprise to both of us when we learned that we had a shared experience of losing a parent as young men, or in our early to mid twenties, during the podcast. We ruminated on how it can be very awkward when other people try to offer word of comfort and how you lose a desire to care about anything mundane. We also talked about male identity as it relates to power, rejection, and feeling like a leader. Finally, and perhaps most controversially, we learn that Caleb is losing his love for Star Wars. There is a lot more included in this episode that can be diluted into words in this box. Like most of us, I am not sure Caleb has it all figured out, but he is someone who I think can be looked to as a model for defining modern masculinity. Big thanks to Caleb for being open, vulnerable, and sharing your insights on life. To everyone else, enjoy this conversation!


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Caleb O'Halloran

Follow on Instagram: @calebohalloran
Follow on Twitter: @caleboh
Website: www.calebohalloran.com

3 - "Led by Men, Done by Women" w/ Caleb O'Halloran

Ty Sorensen is runner, beer connoisseur, husband, son, and Wolverine doppelgänger residing in Portland, OR. Mostly, he is an incredibly passionate, self aware, and caring man whom I have come to admire over the last year and whom I see as a model for what healthy masculinity should look like. It wasn't always this way, however. We talk about our somewhat icy, slow start, which was caused by my first perception of him being not so warm. For Ty, as is the case for some men, this has been a common reaction from people whom he first meets. He also tells me about his upbringing in Kansas City, Kansas where he took to drinking at an early age. The Kansas City life is one that never sat well with Ty, however. He yearned to escape to a city, such as New York or Chicago, while growing up, which he did pretty as soon as he could. Eventually, Ty would find his way, easing up on drinking, taking control of his health, both mentally and physically, and meeting his special lady friend wife, Jillian. What I admire so much about Ty is how he seems to living free from pressure to be anything other than what he wants to be. He is defining what it means to be man for himself, and he is defining his own masculinity along way. In this respect, he reminds me of a gentle, peaceful warrior for whom you do not fear but respect and admire. This conversation left me inspired to embrace my own masculinity and let go of anything external that challenges what I think a man should be. Enjoy!


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Ty Sorensen
Follow on Instagram: @ty.sorensen

2 - "The Peaceful Warrior" w/ Ty Sorensen

Chris Low is a photographer, runner, husband, father, and friend residing in Portland, OR. Even though we had only a professional relationship before recording , he was brave enough to be my first guest on the show, and he delivered in a big way. We covered his approach to parenting, raising a boy, the religious community, and much more. I admire how Chris is moving gently through life, modeling healthy ambition, acknowledging his fear, and sharing the upmost patience and love with his family and those around him. He also displays a beautiful confidence and comfort with not knowing if he is doing things right as a father and man, which I can certainly relate to as a man. This is a wonderful conversation with a truly inspiring man. Enjoy!

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Chris Low
Instagram: @chrislowphoto
Website: http://www.chrislowphoto.com

Jana Roger - Graphic Design
Instagram: @janzy_
Website: www.janarogersdesign.com

Lauren Goché  - Realtor: Portland, OR
Instagram: @laurengoche
Website: laurengoche.com

1 - "My Sweet Boy"  w/ Chris Low

Welcome to the introduction episode of The Modern Masculinity Project. Host Brad Pankey will be your guide, your chauffeur, into the minds of men as we try to redefine masculinity for modern times, a time where we value women and reject being put into categorical boxes. In each episode, Brad will sit down with one man to have an open, honest conversation about our experiences trying to live within the traditional framework of masculinity, what in our childhood shaped us into the men we are today, and how we think a "real" man should be defined. Each episode also serves as a safe space for these men and myself to practice opening up about whatever is on our mind.
While growing up, many men are told that hiding our feelings is a sign of strength. We are told what makes a "real man." The intent in having these conversations is to help men find the courage to open up, to find strength in sharing from the heart. Brad hopes to learn how we can be better fathers, uncles, husbands, sons, coworkers and everything in between. He also hopes men learn ways to discuss their feelings, to be present, and open with other men. And from the bottom of his heart, he also hopes these conversations will help women in some way. Brad's life has been blessed with the presence of many strong, beautiful badass women. Some helped raise him and others have been served as loving friends. As much as he wants this podcast to help men, Brad is motivated to do this for the women in his life whom have helped shape him into the man he is today.
You can expect laughter, maybe a few tears, a sprinkle of tension, a light dusting of phallic jokes, and awkward moments of oversharing. Brad is ready for all of it, and he hopes you'll join him on this journey.
Each new episode, aside from episode one, will drop on every Monday morning. Lastly, to contribute to the show and help make this better, you can email Brad at mmprojectpod@gmail.com, get at him on Twitter @mmprojectpod to join the discussion, ask questions, and provide constructive feedback on the show. Finally, please subscribe to the podcast, rate, and review. Help us spread the word!
Be Present. Stay Open. Much Love.
Cheers

The Modern Masculinity Project

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