Hair-pulling, skin picking, and cheek, lip, & cuticle biting are self-soothing strategies that depending on the degree can become body-focused repetitive behavioral disorders. Learn about a new attachment-informed psychodynamic model for treating these painful, shame-associated behaviors in our conversation today with Sue Marriott and Stacy Nakell.

Healing Body-Focused Repetitive Behavioral Disorders with Stacy Nakell – Replay – (220)

While just the word vulnerability can trigger our defenses, it can also be a great gateway to secure relating and deepening the connection with our authentic selves. In a society heavily influenced by social media, unhealthy gender roles, and many other factors - Ann and Sue dive into the importance of changing the narrative and stepping out of our defensive invulnerable state and into our healthy, vulnerable selves. 

Ditching Invulnerability: Embracing Our Most Authentic Selves (219)

Relating from a place of inner security is not about an attachment category, and it can't stop with us as individuals. Ann and Sue share exciting news and community updates for TU. With secure relating at the forefront, this episode includes a sneak peek into the structure of their new book, Secure Relating Holding Your Own in an Insecure World.  They explain the three R healing spiral, cultivating community, and much more!  Now is a great time to join our online Neuronerd community www.therapistuncensored.com/join!  Find shownotes at www.therapistuncensored.com/tu218.

Cultivating Secure Relating – TU Updates & Book Sneak Peeks with Ann & Sue (218)

Tune in as we follow up on last week's episode, and sit down with amygdala expert, Dr. Joseph LeDoux. We discuss the non-conscious versus unconscious, protein synthesis, the differences between fear and threat, and how it all applies in the world of attachment.

The Amygdala Unpacked with Dr. Joseph LeDoux – Replay (217)

A theory around trauma is that when it occurs it "gets locked in the nervous system" and the way in which the body stores the trauma - in the form of thoughts, feelings, and bodily sensations - can be left fragmented, therefore delaying true healing. Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessings, also known as EMDR, is an evolving science that utilizes bilateral stimulation to help connect the left side of the brain to the right in order to form more cohesive, healing thoughts to better support the healing process. Tune in for this episode as co-host Dr. Ann Kelley and Dr. Parnell take a deep dive into the evolution and successes of EMDR.

Attachment-Focused EMDR – Tools & Techniques to Heal Trauma with Dr. Laurel Parnell – Replay (216)

Attachment 'insecurity" is partly a manifestation of unresolved stress patterns in the child and, by extension, the family. Therapists usually think of stress as interpersonal and dyadic, but you can't isolate individuals from context. We talk about context a lot when it comes to attachment - the circumstances or setting which helps to understand a process more deeply. As Sharon Lambert says in today's episode, you can't "pull yourself up by your bootstraps" if you have no boots. Sue Marriott and Sharon Lambert discuss the unconscious bootstraps communities have that cause blame towards those who are struggling.  www.therapistuncensored.com/episodes to join our premium Neuronerd community www.therapistuncensored.com/join

Attachment, Stress & Bootstraps – The Intersection of Poverty & Mental Health with Dr. Sharon Lambert – Replay (215)

We aren't one thing and getting to know our different parts is an effective technique to deepen healing.  These "parts" are metaphorical "little beings" that live in our minds and manifest into physical or emotional reactions from traumatic events. Dr. Frank Anderson has spent decades of his life studying these parts and sharing his findings to help others utilize built-in resources like their "self-energy" to navigate their own traumas. Join us as Sue Marriott and Dr. Anderson weave together psycho-pharmacology, trauma, neuroscience, attachment, and internal family systems.  More at www.therapistuncensored.com/episodes

Internal Family Systems (IFS), Neuroplasticity and Attachment with Dr. Frank Anderson – REPLAY (214)

The idea of adding 30 minutes of extra meditation to our already busy schedules can feel overwhelming - but Jake Eagle has dedicated years to his research and found the mindfulness loophole. Awe is an incredibly powerful tool that can over time help us rewire our brains and build security within. Eagle is here to prove that awe is not only meant to be found in grand moments like standing at the top of a mountain or hearing your favorite musician live - but in the tiny fragments of our everyday life. Awe is accessible to us each day, and in this episode, Dr. Ann Kelley and Jake Eagle explore strategies like the "A Method" to incorporate mindfulness into our daily routines. These methods can help to ease the tension of the autopilot mode in our brains, reduce inflammation throughout the body, and equip us with the tools to have deeper, more meaningful connections.  Find more at www.therapistuncensored.com/213 and join our Neuronerd community at www.therapistuncensored.com/join.

Clarity, Healing & Purpose is Less Than a Minute Away, the Power of Awe with Jake Eagle (213)

Applying the relational sciences to real life is what this podcast is all about - and today's guest is an expert in this area.  We've invited Stan Tatkin to return for a discussion on secure relating and healthy interdependence. All humans are complicated creatures and if we spend enough time with each other, it's going to get tense.  That part is OK, but what happens after arguing, disconnection or tension is what really matters. www.therapistuncensored.com/212.  Join our Neuronerd Community for unique study opportunites at www.therapistuncensored.com/join.

In Each Other’s Care: Building & Sustaining Healthy Relationships with Stan Tatkin (212)

The Barbie movie has sparked great controversy so we invited journalist Liz Plank to discuss. Some are burning their Barbie's and calling it "anti-man" while others view it as a strategic call out to the challenges both men and women face on a regular basis. We've learned to view the world through a patriarchal lens, so when it's flipped only then can we see how those in power mistreat those who aren't.  This is pro-anyone wanting secure relating and mutuality - all genders welcome!  

Ann and Sue are joined by Liz Plank to dive into the symbolism of the Barbie movie and how it applies to real life and secure relating. Listen now to explore patriarchy, masculinity, and the hierarchies of our society - and important steps we can take to build security through vulnerability for a more inclusive world.

You Are Kenough: Liz Plank joins to unpack the Barbie Movie, Secure Relating, Gender Roles & Patriarchy (211) Bonus Episode

Sue Marriott and Dr. George explore her inspiration for writing her new book, tips for applying the information in a clinical setting, as well as deeper dives into concepts like failed mourning and the relationship with dysregulated attachment. With her decades of research, Dr. George offers thorough insights into the world of attachment, trauma, and building security.

Working with Attachment Trauma Using Lessons from the AAP, Failed Mourning, Disorganized/Dysregulated Attachment with Dr. Carol George (210)

A refresher course on all things attachment from spectrums, connective and protective systems, embodied stories, and much more.

Back to Basics: Understanding All Things Attachment with Ann & Sue (209)

We’ve covered the different protection and connection strategies - preoccupied (red on the spectrum), dismissing (blue on the spectrum), and unresolved (tie-dye), but today’s episode is all about what secure attachment actually looks like in daily life. You’ve experienced the continuum from red, blue, or even tie-dye, but how do you know when you’re in your green? A securely attached system doesn’t mean you’re never upset - it’s about having the ability to stay engaged while you have big feelings.  In this episode, Ann and Sue discuss what this can look like conversationally, conditions that promote a secure base in parenting, and how to check in with yourself and deepen your connection with others.

Secure Attachment & Recognizing Secure States of Mind with Ann & Sue (208)

The neuroscience of awe as an antidote to our stress response system
In this series, Secure Relating in an Insecure World, we&#39;ve covered tough topics head-on. It is, therefore, fitting that we close the series with something scientifically hopeful to help us stay in our secure selves so we can stay engaged and active as social advocates and not collapse in overwhelm.
The science of this specific feeling of awe has garnered much attention for good reason.  Our guest today has spent decades exploring the sensation and documenting how to develop it in everyday life. We have all experienced these small moments that allow us to shift our mindset away from ourselves and into something so bigger. Co-hosts Sue Marriott and Dr. Ann Kelley discuss the power of awe with guest expert Dr. Dacher Keltner where they explore the science, the mystical and the hope of awe as an inspirational tool for collective healing.



&quot;You can be outdoors by yourself, you can be listening to an amazing passage of music, you can think about somebodywhose life really inspires you. You have this urge to connect, to be part of community, to be good to other people, to share with other people, to make the world and your community a little bit better - that tells us something fundamental about the DNA of Awe.&quot; - Dr. Dacher Keltner

Time Stamps for Awe
2:15 - What is awe?

3:31 - Physiology during moments of awe

8:21 - One of Dr. Keltner&#39;s most striking discoveries about awe

8:57 - Understanding everyday awe

10:11 - The role of curiosity in awe

13:31 - The power of music

14:27 - The 8 wonders that bring us awe

21:20 - Collective effervescence

25:38 - Alan Cowen &amp; Dacher Keltner&#39;s experiential maps

27:36 - Awe in animals

32:16 - How awe can sometimes lead you astray

40:17 - Using awe as a tool for younger generations
Resources for today&#39;s episode on the feeling of &quot;awe&quot;
DacherKeltner.com - Personal website full of research, books, videos, and other resources 

Greater Good Science Center - Resource center with podcasts, quizzes, articles &amp; videos 

Science of Happiness - Podcast by the Great Good Network 

AlanCowen.com - Visuals of mapping emotion

You can purchase his most recent book, here!!





About our Guest - Dr. Dacher Keltner

Dr. Keltner is one of the world’s foremost emotion scientists. He is a professor of psychology at UC Berkeley and the director of the Greater Good Science Center. He has over 200 scientific publications and six books, including Born to Be Good, The Compassionate Instinct, and The Power Paradox. He has written for many popular outlets, from The New York Times to Slate. He was also the scientific advisor behind Pixar’s Inside Out, is involved with the education of healthcare providers and judges, and has consulted extensively for Google, Apple, and Pinterest, on issues related to emotion and well-being.

 

 

We support mental health access to those traditionally left out of mains

Awe: A Powerful Tool for Collective Healing with Dr. Dacher Keltner (Series SRIW, Ep 6, 207)

Linda Thai shares her journey of self-discovery as she navigates her own identity in the aftermath of unrecognized transgenerational trauma. She has dedicated her life to building secure relations within herself and her roots, and provides body-oriented healing using  sheds light on the reality of unraveling transgenerational traumas. Through her various healing strategies, she reclaims the unresolved ancestral grief and trauma in her lineage and inspires others to look at our colonized systems through a different lens.

Healing Intergenerational and Ancestral Trauma with Linda Thai (Series SRIW, Ep 5, 206)

Dr. Ann Kelley and Dr. Anna Graybeal discuss the necessary steps to building security and embracing tough conversations within our communities. This conversation takes a scientific and therapy-based approach to guide us toward the big emotions around these topics and equips us with the tools to cope with uncertainties, and an opportunity to learn how to harness healthy discussions around the climate crisis. When we can address the resistance within ourselves, we can use that as fuel to unite and heal our planet, our well-being, and our relationships.

Let’s talk about it: A Pathway for Conversations & Meaningful Change on Climate with Dr. Anna Graybeal (Series SRIW, Ep 4, 205)

This a continuation of our previous discussion with Gliceria Pérez & Debra Chatman-Finley where we explore other lasting effects of racial trauma. From the challenges of parenting with an unresolved trauma history to navigating day-to-day as a person of color, they use group therapy as an opportunity to make space for women to vocalize their pain and build community. Gliceria and Debra share personal stories and real-life examples of microaggressions and discrimination and offer insightful ways white individuals can acknowledge their privilege and cultivate an inclusive community.

Racial Trauma: Challenges to Traditional Therapy, Part 2 of 2 (SRIW Series, Ep 3, 204)

This is part of the series, Secure Relating in an Insecure World AND the first of a 2-parter on racial trauma! BIPOC therapists tell the truth about their experiences - from corporate America to working in child protective services, this discussion is full of painful yet unfortunately common experiences of discrimination, intimidation, and blatant inequality. Gliceria Perez and Debra Chatman-Finley join Sue Marriott as they teach white therapists what it's like for clients of color. They also model how to embrace these tough conversations to create a safe space in our communities. www.therapistuncensored.com/episodes

Navigating Racial Trauma & Identity with Gliceria Pérez & Debra Chatman-Finley Part 1 (SRIW Series, Ep 2, 203)

Finding and maintaining connection and a sense of security in times of fear and general chaos is THE ultimate challenge.  This is a very special episode - co-hosts Dr. Ann Kelley and Sue Marriott are joined by 24-year-old homesteader Mason Marriott-Voss, to discuss navigating big generational differences and re-building a sense of security in an uncertain world. This is the first of the new series, Secure Relating in an Insecure World. See the resource-filled show notes for today's episode at www.therapistuncensored.com/202.

Intergenerational Conversation on Climate with a Young Adult Homesteader (Secure Relating in an Insecure World, new series) Ep.202

Some dreams can feel insignificant, but can be a portal into a deeper understanding of who we are and what we need. When we drift off to sleep each night, we are unlocking a world within ourselves that can help us find healing and take a step towards building security. With Jungian Analysts Deborah Stewart, Lisa Marchiano and Joseph Lee, co-host Dr. Ann Kelley explores the significance of our dreams and the potential journeys of growth through a Jungian lens.

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